Fundamental Techniques in Handling People
1. Don’t criticize, condemn, or complain.
2. Give honest, sincere appreciation.
3. Arouse in the other person an eager want.
Ways to Make People Like You
1. Become genuinely interested in other people.
2. Smile.
3. Remember that a person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.
4. Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.
5. Talk in terms of the other person’s interests.
6. Make the other person feel important – and do it sincerely.
How to Win People to Your Way of Thinking
1. The only way to get the best of an argument is to ignore it.
2. Show respect for the other person’s opinions. Never say, “you’re wrong.”
3. If you are wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically.
4. Begin in a friendly way.
5. Get the other person saying, “yes, yes” immediately.
6. Let the other person do a great deal of the talking.
7. Let the other person feel that the idea is his or hers.
8. Try honestly to see things from the other person’s point of view.
9. Be sympathetic with the other person’s ideas and desires.
10. Appeal to nobler motives.
11. Dramatize your ideas.
12. Throw down a challenge.
Be a Leader
1. Begin with praise and honest appreciation.
2. Call attention to people’s mistakes indirectly.
3. Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other.
4. Ask questions instead of giving direct orders.
5. Let the other person save face.
6. Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement. Be “hearty in your approbation and lavish in your praise.”
7. Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to.
8. Use encouragement. Make fault seem easy to correct.
9. Make the other person happy about doing the thing you suggest.
Facts About Worry
1. If you want to avoid worry, do what Sir William Osler did: Live in “day-tight compartments.” Don’t stew about the future. Just live each day until bedtime.
2. The next time Trouble backs you into a corner, try the magical formula of Willis H Carrier:
a. Ask yourself, “What’s the worst that can possibly happen if I can’t solve my problem?”
b. Prepare yourself mentally to accept the worst – if necessary.
c. Then calmly try to improve upon the worst – which you have already mentally agreed to accept.
3. Remind yourself of the exorbitant price you pay for worry in terms of your health. “Those who do not know how to fight worry die young.”
Basic Techniques in Analyzing Worry
1. Get the facts. Remember that Dean Hawks said that “half the worry in the world is caused by people trying to make decisions before they have sufficient knowledge on which to base a decision.”
2. After carefully weighing the facts, come to a decision.
3. Once a decision is carefully reached – act! Get busy carrying out your decision and dismiss all anxiety about the outcome.
4. When you, or any of your associates, are tempted to worry about a problem, write out and answer the following questions:
a. What is the problem?
b. What is the cause of the problem?
c. What are all possible solutions?
d. What is the best solution?
How to Break the Worry Habit Before it Breaks You
1. Crowd worry out of your mind by keeping busy. Plenty of action is one of the best therapies ever devised for curing “wibber gibbers.”
2. Don’t fuss about trifles. Don’t permit little things – the mere termites of life – to ruin your happiness.
3. Use the law of averages to outlaw your worries. Ask yourself: “What are the odds against this thing’s happening at all?”
4. Cooperate with the inevitable. If you know a circumstance is beyond your power to change or revise, say to yourself: “It is so; it cannot be otherwise.”
5. Put a stop-loss order on your worries. Decide just how much anxiety a thing may be worth – and refuse to give it any more.
6. Let the past bury its dead. Don’t saw sawdust.
How to Keep From Worrying about Criticism
1. Unjust criticism is often a disguised compliment. It often means you have aroused jealousy and envy. Remember that no one ever kicks a dead dog.
2. Do the very best you can; then put up your old umbrella and keep the rain of criticism from running down the back of your neck.
Let’s keep a record of the fool things we have done and criticize ourselves. Since we can’t hope to be perfect, let’s do what E.H. Little did: let’s ask for unbiased, helpful, constructive criticis